Vaughan and I were talking to a gym owner in Auckland this week. He is wondering whether the services of a Life Coach would be a useful value add for his business and naturally his membership.
Like many similar businesses, a new member signs up, attends the gym regularly, initially makes good progress toward their goal of say weight loss, perhaps getting more muscle tone or just increasing levels of fitness, and then their regular attendance falls away, weight lost is regained, fitness decreases.
This is not an uncommon occurrence.
I know, I have done the same.
Joined the gym, had a programme designed for me, done the workouts, got fit. And then dropped out.
Or, after reviewing my progress, my programme has been changed to reflect my improved fitness and strength levels, followed this new regime for a while only to let my commitment slide once again.
- Why does this happen?
- Is it because of the routine of doing the work?
- What happened to that original intention to ‘do something about….’ my weight, my pot belly, my cravings for the wrong foods, and so on???
- Where has my commitment, my motivation gone?
I mean, there’s a personal trainer that helps me, a nutritionist if I want ideas on diet, there’s usually big TV screens, [showing sports or some form of healthy activity], great music, and always members who are really really into the whole fitness, self improvement thing and just going hard out.
- Why not me all of sudden?
- Why did I bother joining in the first place?
- It might have something to do with alignment with my values [what's important].
- Here at Life Coach Auckland we ensure that you get clear as to why you want to do something, is this desire congruent with say a much bigger picture?
- As Stephen Covey says ‘begin with the end in mind’.
- What are the short term and long term benefits?
- Who else in your life will or will not benefit from you reaching your goals?
- Are they [your goals], what you really want? Truly?
You see it’s easy to charge full steam ahead without a plan, or a sense of direction for your life.
So, why not create a workable and sustainable plan, that will fit in with you and your current circumstances, your social or family life.
Minimise or at least acknowledge where the conflicts might arise and then go to work.
At Life Coach Auckland it’s all about making meaningful lasting changes, and achieving better health and fitness is a great place to start
Without robust good health any success in other areas of your life will be compromised.
High energy, a good attitude and stamina will get you places faster and for longer, than without it.
Phil Linklater
Life Coach Auckland
Auckland Life Coach | Do I really need a Life Coach?
After years in the life coaching business, and after talking to many clients as part of Life Coach Auckland, there is one thing we have noticed.
That is, how most people behave differently in different settings? And these different ways of behaving can be quite contrasting.
The caring concerned mother at kindergarten drop-off hardly seems like the same hard-nosed woman that manages a team of plucky, testosterone filled males at the corporate office. Then there’s her husband whose life has been enriched by seeing both faces, and probably a few more. Likewise she would have been exposed to his many sides.
You may even be aware of some of your own inner personalities. Perhaps you’re aware of some that like to consult with you during your self-talk, like the cartoon character with his own little devil on one shoulder and his Saint on the other, both competing for attention and trying to influence his decisions.
Psychology recognizes these diverse elements of the personality as different aspects of the whole person, and they serve a purpose. They help us to adapt to the social environment, bring out what’s needed to get different tasks accomplished, and enable us to meet others at a level of common interest.
When a person who was previously ill tempered and obnoxious, later becomes cheerful and friendly, we tend to say “He’s changed”, when the only thing that’s changed is the behaviour. We are able to express different aspects of ourselves at different times.
You could say we have the ability to play different roles in different circumstances, as you no doubt recognize. But what we don’t usually know – or question – is who chooses the role we play?
Along with the wee devil and the Saint, we have a number of other distinct aspects in our personality. They can be considered as sub-personalities, all striving to express themselves. And depending which one succeeds decides the corresponding role we then play. Because they are semi-autonomous, usually we are quite unconscious of the jousting match that has unfolded within.
Problems arise when a person becomes so fully identified with a particular sub-personality, and lives that identity so completely that they loose touch with who they really are. This can be typical of celebrities in the media fishbowl.
You may know someone who identifies themselves so strongly with their position at work that they have trouble adjusting to family life when they get home, or any aspects of life outside the confines of the office.
A common scenario is the high profile athletes wanting to make a come-back, more often than not because they feel like they have no identity outside the sporting arena that nurtured and shaped a part of them with such great influence.
Such a person is living their life according to their perceived expectations of others. Their own wants and needs become subordinated to meet what society expects from the role they fill. In extreme cases this can destroy a person, as witnessed with too many movie and music celebrities.
Getting to know our sub-personalities can be a wonderful and liberating growth experience. By becoming aware of and understanding them we can better coordinate and direct their expression to our own needs and goals, lessening the feeling of inner conflict as we transform them into helpful allies, allowing us to live with greater harmony and integration.
Want help? For a free interview contact Life Coach Auckland today.
Auckland Life Coach | The Forgotten Art of Listening
Vaughan and I were talking to a gym owner in Auckland this week. He is wondering whether the services of a Life Coach would be a useful value add for his business and naturally his membership.
